Treasure Digest

• It's the Thought That Counts
• So Your Pastor Is Transferring—Don't Switch That Dial!
• Martha Hands and a Mary Heart
• Turning the Hearts..."Thank You, Please and I Love You..."

It's the Thought That Counts

Have you ever been on a highway in the early morning hours and not seen anyone else around you? No cars moving, establishments with their lights off and no visible activity? Did life on earth cease, and no one told you? It only takes a couple of other drivers to bring you back to reality... but for just a few moments, might you feel a little bit lonely and abandoned?

Every year, before we attend the Feast of Tabernacles, many congregations distribute a list of those who will not be able to attend this highly anticipated annual observance. For whatever reason, their life circumstances—usually related to health—prevent them from being able to attend. Undoubtedly, they must feel "left behind" in some sense.

I imagine that it speaks volumes to each of them when someone takes the time to send a postcard and reach out with words of encouragement. It's even better if you can possibly place a phone call or return with a gift or souvenir from your trip. Many of these individuals have attended the Feast of Tabernacles for as long as they have known what it was—possibly before some of us even came into existence. It must seem like a little piece of life is missing when you can't physically partake in God's Holy Days as you once could.

I would think it also creates a greater longing for Christ's return. When God's Kingdom is established, we will be living life as God intended in a world where "God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away" (Revelation 21:4). I know we're all looking forward to that time.

The reason I chose to write about our shut-ins, is that I began to feel somewhat "left behind" myself at the Feast. I attended the Feast in Panama City Beach, Florida, with a 2-month-old. Life with a baby is challenging, especially when you have a 13-year-old ready to go and do! Fortunately, I have a husband who is golden and will help wherever necessary. Unfortunately, that meant he and my son were out on the beach, at the pool, hot tub and youth activities.

Life in the condo was not all it might seem. Cable TV and chocolate only go so far, and so I felt quite secluded. It made me think of the shut-ins. At least I had a nice beach view, church socialization and occasional dinners. What did they have? Were they listening to tapes and waiting for their loved ones to return, so they could listen to recounts of something they had once been able to experience for themselves?

Given too much time to think, I began to feel pretty sorry for myself. But then someone crashed my pity party. A young lady (one of our Houston teens) reached out with a kind expression that made my heart smile. One day, my husband returned from the beach and gave me a beautiful seashell. He explained that this particular young lady had waited for him to complete a beach volleyball game, so that she could give him this seashell to pass along to me. It meant so much—I really needed that! When I saw her the next day at services, I thanked her for the shell and asked her where she found it. She and her sister enthusiastically told me about their daily shell finding adventures. They even had the jellyfish stings to prove it.

Because she found me so grateful for her thoughtfulness, when we returned from the Feast, I received an entire bag of seashells. Although the shells were quite beautiful to look at, it was really the thought that meant so much to me. I keep these seashells in a glass container on my desk, so that each morning I can remember where they came from, when they came to me and how much they meant when I was feeling all but forgotten. It also serves as a daily reminder to take time for those who might be feeling "out of sight, out of mind."

I gained a greater understanding of those who might be feeling alone at a time when the rest of God's brethren are together rejoicing. Until we are all finally able to enter God's Kingdom as a family, let's continue to remember our shut-ins in heart, mind, prayers and deeds.

— Sharon VanSchuyver
Houston, Texas, North congregation (previously appeared in the Houston North Quarterly)

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So Your Pastor Is Transferring—Don't Switch That Dial!

There are three things in life that we can be sure of: death, taxes and change. And all three we fear.

I hate change! I should sail through change; after all, I have had plenty of training while I was a child going from foster home to foster home. Ten homes to be exact and, oh yes, let's add two children's homes on top of that. All of this change in a 10-year period. But when change comes rolling into my life, I fight it, I get angry, I get depressed over it and I fear it!

Recently a very small change made me think about bigger changes.

Every morning on the way to work I tune into my favorite radio station. This radio station plays the songs I love, and I had grown used to hearing the same voice each morning with his warm and witty comments, occasional humor, sharing his life with his listeners and giving us inspirational things to get us going each morning.

I could count on hearing that same familiar voice every morning. I was so moved by this disc jockey's contribution to the station that I e-mailed him to let him know how inspiring he was.

Then one Monday a new voice announced that this disc jockey was no longer working at their station. I miss this guy and his gentle voice. It was a little like losing a family member. I tried to listen to the new guy, but it was so different. Even the music format was changed. I finally got frustrated and changed the dial.

One of the hardest changes for members in God's Church is to adjust when their pastor is asked to transfer. For some this might be a welcome change; for others this could be like losing a family member or a very close friend. Especially if you have worked very closely with him and counseled with him about problems. Maybe he baptized you or married your children. He was there for you when you were going through your toughest times. So the adjustment period with a new pastor can be difficult.

I have gone through transfers, and my friends will tell you, I don't sail though them with ease. But I have learned some things recently that have helped.

1. Be kind to yourself if you are having a hard time adjusting. It takes time! Give yourself some time to grieve and talk to God a lot about it. Ask God to encourage you.

2. Realize your new pastor is adjusting too. You only have to get to know him; he has to get to know a whole church. Getting outside of your own feelings and reaching out to help the new pastor and his family adjust will help you heal more quickly.

3. Support him! The new pastor will come in with fresh ideas and different ways of doing things. Support him. Support the programs that he starts up. Support them with an attitude that you want them to succeed. Lack of support can cause a pastor to become discouraged. Put yourself in his shoes and ask yourself how you would feel if people did not support your ideas, talked behind your back and complained. Support him and God will bless you.

4. Don't compare your new pastor with your former minister. We can learn and grow from being exposed to a variety of personalities. I once had a minister who was into the finer things of life, like silver, china and ladies' teas. So I went out and bought a silver tea set. When my next minister came in, wow! What a difference. He was a camper and would never think of a ladies' tea. So I packed up the silver tea set, placed it in a closet, went out and bought a tent. I am so grateful for the difference because it enriched my life in many ways.

5. Be willing to decrease. Many times ministers come in and make changes. This may affect what you have been doing for years. This is your greatest opportunity to shine by getting behind him and supporting the change. God will see your humble heart and will bless you in ways you did not imagine. Always remember the expression, "when one door closes, another one opens."

6. Pray. Pray for God's blessing on the new pastor and his family. Ask God to help him succeed.

7. Use this new opportunity to learn more and grow. Each pastor brings a new perspective and a new way of doing things.

Change can be a very positive experience for all of us and our new pastor if we make up our mind to do all we can to make it work. So don't switch that dial! Don't tune out! Give it time! Seize the opportunity that God has given you for greater growth and remember: "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28).

— Janet Treadway
Cincinnati East, Ohio, congregation

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Martha Hands and a Mary Heart

Many are familiar with the story of the two sisters from Bethany, found in Luke 10:38-42. Martha, the practical sister, busied herself with caring for the physical needs of her important guests. Meanwhile, Mary was focused on increasing her own spiritual understanding by listening to what Christ was teaching.

What can we learn from the examples of both women?

At that moment, Mary had the right idea. After all, the "Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many" (Matthew 20:28). He wasn't looking for someone to see to His physical needs just then. Mary correctly discerned that the most important thing she could be doing at that moment was listening to what her Creator had to say. She had the spiritual, rather than the physical, as her first priority.

But, in contrast, were Martha's actions completely off-base? Obviously, she was corrected for being "worried and troubled about many things" (Luke 10:41), but she also had the excellent motivation of trying to serve her guests.

Paul writes that "as we have opportunity, let us do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith" (Galatians 6:10). Christ did not rebuke her diligence, but rather that she did not discern that at that time there was something of greater significance to focus on.

God does not ignore the need for physical work or service. In fact, He wants us to work hard in this life and do our best (Ecclesiastes 9:10). But we must also have our hearts attuned to what is necessary—to recognize what is crucial for our spiritual growth and that whatever that is should be our top priority.

Each of us needs to maintain the physical diligence of Martha, while having the spiritual discernment and focus of Mary. In short, it is wise to have Martha hands and a Mary heart.

— Debbie Werner
Portland, Oregon, congregation

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Turning the Hearts
"Thank You, Please and I Love You..."

Manners and courtesy have never gone out of style. They have just been neglected.

While humans have devised certain rules of etiquette, the basic principle is found in Scripture: "Whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them" (Matthew 7:12), also called the Golden Rule. Children learn courtesy and manners by the examples they see and by being taught.

Our daughters both loved a little Golden Book, Raggedy Ann: A Thank You, Please, and I Love You Book. It went out of print, but we managed to keep copies of it. Our daughters could finish the various rhymes about gratitude and courtesy to others. Here are a few of the rhymes:

"People are happy to hear Andy on the phone, because he always says hello in such a friendly tone."

"Here in the sandbox our Andy and Ann share all of their playthings the best way they can."

"Ann won't give Andy a piece of her candy—it's not that she's meaning to tease. He wants it so badly, she'd give him some gladly—but Andy forgot to say PLEASE."

To teach children to say "thank you" when they receive something or have something done for them is to help them be grateful to others in life. Teaching them to share and wait their turn in line also teaches the principle of courtesy. Teaching them to respond with a "yes" or "no" (maybe even a "yes, Sir" or "no, Ma'am," which might seem outdated, but is very respectful) instead of a "yeah" or "nah" or no response will help them show more respect and communicate more effectively.

Showing respect for the elderly by giving them more comfortable places to sit or letting them in line ahead of you also helps teach our children to show respect. This lesson will hold them in good stead when they meet their boss for the first time.

Teaching our children to be friendly and greet others is another way of helping them show love to others. In our families, we should expect our children to want to say good night to their parents with a hug or a kiss. Just disappearing into the bedroom at bedtime is not teaching them to show love.

Parents who teach courtesy, appreciation, love and respect to their children solidify their teaching if they practice showing courtesy, appreciation, love and respect. When our children see us practicing what we teach, they will more easily adopt the Golden Rule as their own.

As that favorite little book concludes, "'I'll give you a bear hug,' says Andy to Ann, and he hugs her and hugs her as tight as he can. 'I love you,' says Ann, getting up on her toes, and she gives him a kiss on the tip of his nose. They are fond of each other, it's easy to see, and the reason is simple as simple can be! They use their good manners wherever they go, and this makes them very nice people to know!"

— Gary Antion