You know you're off in your relationship with God, but it seems too hard to put it back on track. This feeling causes all kinds of negative thoughts that adversely affect our outlook on life and our future. I identified my malaise as burnout or apathy. One analogy compares burnout to trudging across a desert and being so spiritually and emotionally parched that there are few reserves to serve and give to others. This time, I didn't care that I felt burned out. I didn't seem to have strength to fight those terrible feelings. How could the Father expect me to be spiritually charged all the time?

I want to share my experience with you, in hopes of helping others who may be burned out, or headed for burnout on the Christian road of life. I kept telling myself that this paralyzing condition shouldn't be happening to a follower of Jesus Christ. After all, we have His Holy Spirit in us and our spiritual tank should not be on empty. This Spirit is life changing. It's powerful. Then why did I feel the way I did?

I tried not to blame God, but I was angry. I moped around and even prayed for God to pull me out of this dreadful mental state, but He didn't answer and I didn't like that. It seemed to be getting worse. I found myself brooding and getting easily distracted from meeting with God through prayer and Bible study. Even though I knew I needed God, I seemed to harbor unfair and unkind thoughts toward Him. It became a vicious cycle. The worse I felt, the less I wanted to sit with God. The less spiritual diet I ingested, the less motivation I had to fight the debilitating thoughts. Satan seemed to be winning. What could I do? Hadn't I already prayed?

Next, I reached out to my husband, Jim. He and I talked. Jim questioned the amount of time I had been spending in spiritual pursuits lately. I didn't like what he was saying, but he was right. Less time with God had taken its toll on my spiritual bedrock. I examined myself. Why was I so upset with God? I prayed again and went to God's Word with hope that it would wash my mind. Slowly but surely God, over the next few days, helped me unravel my anger and repent of it. The answers came from a variety of sources: my dear husband's insight, the Holy Scriptures, prayer and frank discussions with a caring Christian friend. She allowed me to reveal aloud my innermost frustrations and shame. This let me own those angry thoughts and identify them and then face them. Help also came from a book a friend had given me, Women of a Generous Spirit, by Lois Rabey. I'd like to share some of her points and a few of my own for healing burnout.

Meet with God. Ask yourself questions about why you're upset. Write down your honest feelings. Pray for help to understand the root cause of your feelings. Reflect on God's Word. The Psalms are particularly helpful. Give yourself time to receive an answer. "Take one step of obedience" is a point Mrs. Rabey makes. God may reveal the need for you to express a loving act of kindness to others. After you have come back into a right relationship with God, act on what God's Spirit prods you to do. Give and share and be thankful. We live in times that are spiritually and physically challenging. If you're not taking the time with God that you used to, stop now and make the time. Don't let anything separate you from the love of God.