Here are specific positive statements that you can incorporate in dealing with your children. Realize though that children can see through insincerity. They don't like hypocrisy. They want a "straight shooter."

Your encouragement must be sincere. If it is not, it will "ring hollow" over time. You must be sincere or these comments will not reap the rich reward they can produce. Never use these messages sarcastically or you will damage their effectiveness and your child won't trust you when you mean them. Use them often, whenever they are appropriate.

• I knew you could do it!
• You're doing a great job!
• I'm proud of the way you are sticking to this!
• I know this is hard; you're really working at it!
• You've made a lot of progress!
• Thanks for picking up those books. You are such a big helper! I really appreciate it!
• It was very nice of you to help the younger boy today; I'm really proud of you!

Children thrive on positive attention. Children need to feel loved and appreciated. Unfortunately, many parents find it is easier to provide negative feedback than positive feedback. UN