“Forgiveness – What We Need to Do”

Steve Corley

Given in Kingsport on Sabbath, May 11, 2024

Given in Knoxville on Sabbath, May 25, 2024

Recently Mr. Ledbetter gave a sermon about the magnitude of the forgiveness God shows to us.  Christ’s great sacrifice – of His own flesh and blood – which He made at His last Passover as a human being has been applied to us.  He and God the Father have forgiven us.  But there are conditions.  Now what must we do?  We have been through the Passover (representing the forgiveness of our sins) and the subsequent Days of Unleavened Bread (representing our struggle to come out of committing future sins).  This sermon will be a sequel to Mr. Ledbetter’s sermon (he told me to go ahead and do this).  If we can draw an analogy between Mr. Ledbetter’s sermon and the Passover, we can draw a similar analogy between this sermon today and the Days of Unleavened Bread.  I would like to talk about how we must forgive others.  We can title the sermon “Forgiveness – What We Need to Do.”

In Luke 17:3-4 Christ tells us that we must forgive our brother if he sins against us and repents.  As long as he does say he repents, we cannot use the excuse that he has sinned against us too recently or too many times. We must accept his professed repentance even if he sins against us seven times in a single day.  We must always accept his profession of repentance and give him the benefit of the doubt.  We might ask “if he has wronged us seven times in a day and professes repentance each time, then how could his repentance be genuine if he goes back and wrongs us again so quickly?”  But Christ was addressing exactly this point.  If we refuse to forgive the sinner based on a belief that his repentance is not genuine, we are treading on extremely dangerous ground (Matt. 6:15 and 18:35).  Whenever we say “apology not accepted” we are playing with fire – potentially with the lake of fire.  If we do not forgive the sins of others then God will not forgive our sins – and, since the penalty of sin is death, God will have no option other than to burn us up in the lake of fire.

In Matt. 18:21-22 Christ told Peter that we must forgive someone who sins against us “up to seventy times seven” (clearly meaning a number of times with no end, not that the 491st sin is unforgivable).  The parable of the unforgiving servant follows in verses 23-34.  The lesson of the parable is that because of our sins we owe God a debt which we could not possibly pay except with our life (remember that Paul tells us in Romans 6:23 that “the wages of sin is death”).  Only the application of Christ’s sacrifice to us can enable the forgiveness of our sins and the cancellation of the penalty of eternal death – and Christ’s sacrifice cannot be applied to us unless we are willing to forgive others.

Christ’s commands to forgive in Matt. 6:14-15 (after the prayer guide) and in Matt. 18:35 (at the end of the parable of the unforgiving servant) contain a chilling warning.  If we do not forgive others who have done wrong against us, then God the Father will not forgive our sins.  The parable of the unforgiving servant illustrates the sheer magnitude of our sins against God in comparison with any wrongs which others may have done to us – as shown by the huge amount of money which the first servant owed his master in comparison with the amount the second servant owed the first (Matt. 18:24 and 28).  (It might be noted that the amount of money which the second servant owed the first was not insignificant – it was equivalent to about 100 days’ wages for a common laborer in those days (cf. Matt. 20:2)).  Also, we might note that in the parable the second servant admitted his debt, expressed willingness to pay it and begged for mercy – begged for time to allow him to earn the money to pay off the debt.  The second servant did not show an angry or entitled attitude, deny that he owed the first servant anything, or demand that the debt be canceled – such an attitude would not have represented repentance.)

What does forgiveness entail?  If we forgive a person, it means that we no longer hold a grudge against that person.  We will not bring up a wrong which was committed in the past and was repented of and forgiven, in the future – we will not reopen old wounds from the past (cf. 1 Cor. 13:5 – “thinks no evil” might be better translated as “keeps no accounts of evil”).  However, forgiveness does not necessarily mean that the person must be immediately given back all the rights and privileges which he or she had before the wrong was committed.  An example can be found in the parable of the prodigal son in Luke 15.  We can note that the father said to the older son that everything the father had would be inherited by the older son (verse 31).  The prodigal son showed repentance (verse 21) and was forgiven by the father and welcomed back as his son.   However the father was not going to take what was left of his property and re-divide it for inheritances between the two sons – the younger son had already received, spent and wasted his portion of the inheritance and he was going to have to live with that fact for the rest of his life.  Likewise, David’s sins of adultery with Bathsheba and subsequently arranging the death of Uriah were forgiven upon his repentance (2 Sam. 12:13).  God was not going to punish him with death – the wages of sin (Rom. 6:23).  However, David was still going to have to suffer some penalties in his human life from then on (2 Sam. 12:10, 14) – and these penalties were for his benefit, to teach him not to sin again.  Likewise, Moses and Aaron, after dishonoring God at Meribah-Kadesh, were going to suffer the penalty of not being allowed to lead Israel into the main part of Canaan west of the Jordan River – they needed to learn that there were penalties for dishonoring God and that they should never do so again.

Similarly, if we are the parents of an underage child, we can forgive him when he has done something wrong while still imposing a penalty on him – such as loss of privileges for a period of time.  This temporary penalty is for the benefit of the child – to remind him not to commit the same act again.  Likewise, if one of us is the boss of someone at work who commits some type of major infraction, we can forgive that person while still sending him to the back of the line as far as opportunities for promotion are concerned – he does need to learn not to commit the same mistake again.  But that does not mean that we are free to put any “penalty” we want on a person who has wronged us after we claim to have forgiven him.  If we are not the parent, or the boss, of the person concerned there is usually very little we can do to “punish” the person without stepping over the line into non-forgiveness.  If the person is a service provider and does a poor job – but apologizes – we can forgive him but also switch to another contractor, at least for a time.  But we still must not hold any type of grudge, especially a permanent grudge, against the person.  If we do, then have we really forgiven him?

We have shown that we must forgive our brother (or by extension any other person) of wrongs he has committed toward us if he has apologized, if he has shown repentance for his actions (Luke 17:3).  Now we get into a complex subject – are we required to forgive the unrepentant and, if so, to what extent?  If the person is a brother – what we need to do when he wrongs us is spelled out clearly in Matthew 18:15-17.  We are to go to our brother privately first and if he admits the wrong and apologizes, if he shows repentance, we must forgive him (Luke 17:3).  If he refuses to admit the wrong, then we are to bring one or two others (as witnesses) and have another discussion with him (remember that we must be sure to bring witnesses who would keep the discussion private and would not be gossip spreaders!).  If that step does not convince the brother, then we are to take the matter “to the church” – to the ministry (Matt. 18:17).  As an ultimate penalty the ministry may disfellowship the offender (send him out of the Church and back into the world – like a “heathen and a tax collector”).  This disfellowshipment penalty is itself also for the person’s benefit – in hope that while out in the world he will come to understand that he has sinned, needs to repent and hopefully will want to return to the fellowship of the Church.  As Paul said in 1 Cor. 5:5, “deliver such a one to Satan (the ruler of this age) for the destruction of the ‘flesh’ (σάρξ, “sarx,” Strong’s #4561, human nature, the carnal mind) that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.”  We can see from 2 Cor. 2:5-7 (assuming the same man was being referred to) that the disfellowshipment indeed had the desired effect – Paul told the Corinthians to forgive the (now repentant) offender and welcome him back.

If the one who has offended us is a brother likewise we must not let the argument escalate into anything resembling “fighting” (James 4:1).  Except as part of a procedure mentioned in Matt. 18:15-17, we must not speak evil of a brother – we certainly must not gossip (James 4:11).  We must not sue a brother in court – any such disputes must be settled within the Church (1 Cor. 6:1-7). 

But in most cases the one who has wronged us – who has sinned against us – and shows no apology or repentance will not be a brother, but rather an outsider, a person of this world.  This fact brings up the issue of to what extent – if any – we must forgive the unrepentant.  Some Scriptural passages at first glance may appear to contradict one another regarding this matter.  Over the years I have heard arguments in both directions made within the Church of God – each based on one or the other set of Scriptures.  But if we look closely the Scriptures do not contradict one another – and the true Scriptural examples on this question fall somewhere “in the middle” of the controversy.

Let’s look at the relevant Scriptures.  In Matthew 6:15 Jesus warns us that if we do not forgive the sins of others against us then God the Father will not forgive our sins.  There is no mention of whether or not the one who wrongs us is repentant.  In Luke 17:3 Jesus tells us to forgive our brother (and by extension anyone) if he wrongs us and then expresses repentance.  But again, what about the question of someone who wrongs us and shows no repentance – do we have to forgive him or do we not?  There are in fact at least three Scriptures dealing directly with this matter.  One is in Luke 23:34.  Here Jesus asked His Father to forgive those who had condemned Him to death and who were torturing and killing Him.  Remember that Jesus Himself had authority to forgive sins (Luke 7:48) but He did not tell His oppressors at that time that their sins were forgiven – because they had not repented.  However, He saw that they did not realize that they were condemning and killing the Messiah – and they still had the potential to repent in the future when the enormity of their sin was revealed to them.  Hence Jesus prayed to His Father that His Father would forgive their sins – at such time in the future as they would repent. 

As he was being stoned to death for telling the religious leaders what they did not want to hear, Stephen followed Jesus’ example and asked God not to charge those who were stoning him with their sin (Acts 7:60).  He likewise realized that they did not really understand what they were doing – and as we all realize the one who may have been the ringleader of the killers, Saul (or Paul), repented dramatically (Acts 22:20) and turned into one of God’s most important servants.  Paul himself likewise followed the example of both Christ Himself and Stephen when he asked God not to charge those who had forsaken him at his first defense before the court of Caesar in Rome (2 Tim. 4:16). 

And likewise we should behave similarly toward those who wrong us and refuse to repent.  In what they are doing they are behaving as our enemies – but Christ told us to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us (Matt. 5:44).  We certainly must not attempt any revenge on our enemies (Lev. 19:18, Romans 12:19).  But we cannot yet ourselves actually forgive them because they have not repented – and God does not expect us to do so yet.  They almost certainly, however, do not fully understand what they are doing and have the potential to repent in the future.  We should follow the examples of Stephen, Paul and Christ Himself and pray for God the Father to forgive them – which He will do in the future when they repent.  And when they repent we will forgive them, in this life if we are still alive at that time – or when they come up in the second resurrection and are brought to repentance then.

Won’t it be a wonderful sight in the first resurrection when Stephen and Paul first meet!  Paul will have the chance to express to Stephen himself the deep repentance which Paul so expressed in Scripture for what he had done.  Stephen will see the magnitude of Paul’s repentance and will finally have the chance to forgive him personally.  And Stephen will find out all about what Paul did to spread the gospel of Christ in subsequent years after Stephen’s death – and will realize that the final prayer he uttered as he was being stoned was answered many times over!

But – as I have mentioned in previous sermons there indeed was one man about whom Christ saw no possibility of forgiveness – ever.  We read in 1 Sam. 16:7 that God looks on the heart.  He can read minds.  So could Jesus Christ as a human being.  He could read the mind of Judas Iscariot and sense how utterly evil he was – Judas was the human type of Satan and Jesus called him “a devil” (John 6:70).  No other human being in the pages of the Bible is called a “devil” (although in Matt. 16:23 Christ did say to Peter “Get behind Me, Satan” when Peter was temporarily showing a satanic attitude).  But – unlike God the Father and Jesus Christ, we cannot see into people’s minds (1 Sam. 16:7).  Hence this is why we must always take their professions of repentance at face value (as Jesus told us in Luke 17:3-4).

So let us do our part.  Let us be the opposite of the unforgiving servant.  In appreciation of the great sacrifice of Christ which made possible the forgiveness of our great sins against God and which has removed the death penalty from us, let us always be ready and eager to forgive others when they come before us and apologize for the much smaller sins and wrongs they have committed against us.  Let us not hold grudges against them – and let us particularly not hold any grudges against our brothers in Christ.  And regarding those who commit wrongs against us and do not repent – although we cannot yet forgive them personally, let us follow Christ’s example and pray for God the Father to forgive their sins when they repent in the future.  By following Christ’s commands and His example we will show our faith by our works (James 2:14-26) – and we will be assured that God will continue to give us the forgiveness which we so need.