I have learned that those who have not experienced great loss may not understand the grieving process.

Grieving for a lost loved one does not end in this lifetime.

You may accept the loss and move on, but the realization of lost tomorrows does not go away.

At first, the loss is felt in every breath you breathe. Then minutes will go by before you feel the stab of loss. Eventually hours, days go by without you thinking about it. Finally, you will realize it has been at least a month, and maybe the time will come when you go a year without thinking about who you have lost. The reality is that at times it will grip you all over again with the same intensity throughout your life, but the occurrences become wider apart.

You are reminded that they will not be there for children to grow up, for special moments and milestones you would have shared, and they were not there to hold you as you sorrowed.

If a child dies, you grieve for the lost potential that you will not witness in this lifetime. Something is always missing in family pictures and gatherings from that time forward

My husband’s great aunt would still cry when she talked of a child she lost because of a birth defect that kept food from entering the child’s stomach. At that time no one knew why this beautiful, perfectly formed, full-term infant failed to thrive until they did an autopsy. She had eight other children who survived.

Do not think because a person has other children that the loss of one is less intense.

Do not dismiss a person’s grief by reminding them that others have had it worse. The story of Job is not in the Bible to be an example of how to tell someone they have not had it so bad.

Do not tell someone who is grieving that time heals all wounds. The time will come for complete healing, but not in this lifetime.

Do not tell a young person who has lost a spouse that they are young and they will move on without the one they have lost. That thought is devastating to them.

Do be there to lend a helping hand for the things they are not able to cope with.

Do share stories of things their lost loved ones have done or shared with you. A grieving person needs to hear these reminders of the person they have lost, even if it causes tears to flow.

Do remind them of our God who does not forget anyone, and that the time will come when He will desire to see the work of His hands.

"You shall call, and I will answer You; You shall desire the work of Your hands" (Job 14:15).

Losing a husband at a young age made me aware of just how temporary we are. We tend to think we are invincible when we are young. It is hard to go on without them knowing you will not see them again for a lifetime. You have a heightened awareness of how precious our time with one another is. Even today, when others who married around the time we did celebrate milestone anniversaries, I am saddened that David and I were robbed of that opportunity.

As Christians, we do not grieve as those who do not have a hope of seeing their loved ones again, but we do still feel the lost times we might have had.

God's biblical festivals are a reminder to us that a time is coming when all grief will be ended.

The apostle Paul wrote: "But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who sleep in Jesus. For this we say to you by the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and remain until the coming of the Lord will by no means precede those who are asleep. 

For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of an archangel, and with the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And thus we shall always be with the Lord. 

Therefore comfort one another with these words" (1 Thessalonians 4:13-19).

Ultimately, we know God's plan for this world: "And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away” (Revelation 21:4).