Harry and Sally sat on their back porch enjoying the soft summer breeze.  They listened to the sounds of a nearby creek and the chirping of crickets.  Harry wistfully commented on how crickets sure can sing.  Sally agreed, but her mind was really on the harmony of the choir singing at a nearby evening church service.

"Beautiful music isn't it?" Sally asked.

"Yes," Harry responded, "And to think they make that sound by rubbing their legs together."

Human beings were designed to share life in relationship with each other.  Unfortunately, misunderstandings-from those as simple as the one between Harry and Sally-to more serious conflicts have damaged or destroyed many relationships.

Points to build on

Words have the power to hurt, encourage, correct, educate, tell the truth or a lie, and express love or hatred.  Solomon wrote that wisdom is exhibited in the verbal expressions of everyday communication.

A wise person knows when to speak and when not to speak.

Proverbs 10:19 -  "In the multitude of words, sin is not lacking, But he who restrains his lips is wise."

A wise person avoids slander and gossip.

Proverbs 10:18 - "Whoever hides hatred has lying lips, And whoever spreads slander is a fool."

Proverbs 17:9 -  "He who covers a transgression seeks love, But he who repeats a matter separates the best of friends."

Proverbs 25:23 - "The north wind brings rain, And a backbiting tongue an angry countenance."

A wise person is able to keep a secret.

Proverbs 11:13 - "A talebearer reveals secrets, But he who is of a faithful spirit conceals a matter."

Proverbs 20:19 - "He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets, Therefore do not associate with one who flatters with his tongue."

A wise person doesn't use words to hurt others for selfish reasons.

Proverbs 11:9 - "The hypocrite with his mouth destroys his neighbor, But through knowledge the righteous will be delivered."

Proverbs 12:17-19 - "He who speaks truth declares righteousness, But a false witness deceit.  There is one who speaks like the piercing of a sword, But the tongue of the wise promotes health.  The truthful lip shall be established forever, But a lying tongue is but for a moment."

Proverbs 16:24 - "Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones."

A wise person is aware of how words can be used and tries to pick words carefully.

Proverbs 10:32 - "The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable, But the mouth of the wicked is perverse."

Proverbs 13:3 - "He who guards his mouth preserves his life, But he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction."

Proverbs 15:1 -  "A soft answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger."

Proverbs 14:4 - "The lips of the wise disperse knowledge, But the heart of the fool does not do so."

A wise person experiences a better life by controlling what he or she says.

Proverbs 10:11 - "The mouth of the righteous is a well of life, But violence covers the mouth of the wicked."

Proverbs 15:4 - "A wholesome tongue is a tree of life, But perverseness in it breaks the spirit."

Proverbs 15:23 - "A man has joy by the answer of his mouth, And a word spoken in due season, how good it is!"

Proverbs 21:23 - "Whoever guards his mouth and tongue, Keeps his soul from troubles."

A wise person isn't always trying to argue and debate.

Proverbs 16:27-28 - "An ungodly man digs up evil, And it is on his lips like a burning fire.  A perverse man sows strife, and a whisperer separates the best of friends."

A wise person is truthful and doesn't lie.

Proverbs 26:20-28 - "Where there is no wood, the fire goes out; And where there is no talebearer, strife ceases.  As charcoal is to burning coals, and wood to fire, So is a contentious man to kindle strife.  The words of a talebearer are like tasty trifles, And they go down into the inmost body.  Fervent lips with a wicked heart, are like earthenware covered with silver dross.  He who hates, disguises it with his lips, And lays up deceit within himself; When he speaks kindly, do not believe him, For there are seven abominations in his heart; Though his hatred is covered by deceit, His wickedness will be revealed before the assembly.  Whoever digs a pit will fall into it, And he who rolls a stone will have it roll back on him.  A lying tongue hates those who are crushed by it, And a flattering mouth works ruin."

Application

Our spoken words reflect our thoughts and emotions.  Wise speech begins with wise thoughts. Like all aspects of wisdom, wise speaking requires first filling the mind with knowledge, understanding and wisdom.  The old adage, "think before you speak" may be one of the most difficult lessons of life.