Kneeling before the toilet in the motel’s bathroom I prayed, “Father, please help me get a deer today.” The early morning sun illuminated the snowcapped mountains’ panorama above Squaw Valley in 1967 with an excitement that compelled me to run towards their base. Carrying my brother’s new 30-30 lever action rifle, the climb up into the steep and wooded wilderness of unknown sights and sounds was exhilarating.

Having nearly died three years earlier from a ruptured spleen, each new day was an appreciated gift from God that I thanked Him for with regularity. The difficulty in working my way up the steep terrain was continually rewarded with ever-expanding views, first of the valley below and eventually including other mountain ranges that stretched to the horizon. A last glance into Squaw Valley showed a curiously miniature complex of tiny buildings with moving vehicles that were oddly silent from up so high.

Nearing the summit, I came across a huge thicket of Manzanita brush that blocked my way forward. Close by, the crown of a downward curving section of granite rock that eventually steepened into a cliff. Its curved top offered an unobstructed way around the dense vegetation. The granite face had been overexposed to the elements, and under my boots’ its surface began peeling away until I was suddenly sliding down an ever-increasing grade towards the face of the cliff. Unable to gain traction from the disintegrating rock layer, I cried, “Father, please help me!”

Diminishing seconds were all that separated me from rapidly approaching disaster as I released the rifle in a facedown, spread eagle position, utilizing every surface of my body to arrest the slide until finally stopping. Watching the dislodged rocks continue their downhill journey was something to really appreciate and give thanks for and I did. Then, carefully and cautiously, utilizing surface cracks and the more solid sections of granite, I was able to move across the crumbling face and work downwards to retrieve the carbine from a small ledge. The rifle’s fresh “patina” would always be a reminder of that event.

Later, the deepening woods swallowed this 15-year old, so anxious to get his first deer. The only sounds were an occasional squawk of a Steller’s Jay, the hollow drumming of a woodpecker in a distant tree, and the ever-whispering Ponderosa pines swaying slowly overhead. Checking the crisp official California deer tag whose sole purpose was to be tied to an antler, I again asked God for help in getting a deer, while applying all the hunting principles, my father had taught me. Moving through the wilderness alone with a rifle never felt so exhilarating. But my cautious steps and endless scanning revealed only empty meadows, bare boulders, dense brush, and no deer.

Soon, another patch of Manzanita blocked the path; brush so tough and springy that if one threw himself into it, it would throw him right back out. However, there was a low-growing section ahead that could be walked across. With boots stepping into the brush, the unexpected happened in a way never imagined. Suddenly, from the low brush just ahead, a young antlered buck jumped up. With my heart pounding, clicking noises coming from my throat, and my body shaking in excitement, I trained the rifle on him. Everything had happened so fast that my mind raced to assess the situation. The distance to the deer was not 500 yards, nor even 50 yards. Rather, he stood just five-yards away. “Thank you, thank you, thank you…Father” was all I could say!

Our Focus

As humans, we often focus on the exciting things we get to have and do in our lives. We each tally our lot and compare it with that which others appear to have. Many times, we seemingly come up short. From childhood, we discounted what we were given while comparing it to what someone else had. Our parents didn’t do enough for us, didn’t spend enough time with us and didn’t give us enough stuff. There wasn’t enough excitement, a good enough room, nice enough clothes, the best education or enough money to live a good life. Youth, focused on its self, can never get enough and so derides those who it feels are responsible. Too often, that mindset continues on into adulthood with harbored resentments about what one did not receive. God warns us about having a “get/take” mentality. Solomon wrote,

The leech has two daughters— Give and Give! There are three things that are never satisfied, Four never say, "Enough!”: The grave, The barren womb, The earth that is not satisfied with water—And the fire never says, "Enough!" The eye that mocks his father, And scorns obedience to his mother, The ravens of the valley will pick it out, And the young eagles will eat it (Proverbs 30:15-17).

Remember how excited you were to have new school supplies at the beginning of the year? Remember how your new clothes were just a bit stiff the first time you put them on? Or, how that new pair of sneakers made you feel like you could run a hundred-miles-an-hour? Remember when you finally got an outfit that was just for Church? Or, when Mom made you that dish that nobody has been able to copy since? Remember your favorite teachers in school, your favorite class and the sport you did well at? Remember that summer at Camp where your skills blossomed among new friends? Those fond memories weren’t actually about you. They were the sums of sacrifices being made FOR you.

We don’t remember our diaper days, our teething fits, or the tens of thousands of hours and dollars spent in feeding, training, teaching, housing, clothing, transporting, protecting, babysitting, helping, consoling, and encouraging that was done by parents, teachers and church members who sacrificed in order to embellish our lives. Instead, we choose to critique our past by comparing its events with others we wish we had had. In a selfish state of mind, one easily ignores sacrifices made by family, spouse, employer, friends, the Church and even God. If not realized and repented of, one’s pursuit of self-fulfillment is repulsive to those around him and results in isolation.

There is one alone, without companion: He has neither son nor brother. Yet, there is no end to all his labors, Nor is his eye satisfied with riches. But he never asks, "For whom do I toil and deprive myself of good?" This also is vanity and a grave misfortune (Ecclesiastes 4:8).

There are so many aspects of your life right now to be thankful for that you could spend the rest of your life showing gratitude for them. Every grain of sand is a miracle, every drop of water, every ray of sunshine, every living cell, the entirety of the universe and our ability to perceive it. Yet, do you pause to appreciate all you have been given or selfishly focus on what you don’t yet have? God the Father and His Son have devoted their current existence to giving you everything They possibly can, including Their likeness, Spirit, and Son’s life. What do They ask in return?

Serve the LORD with gladness; Come before His presence with singing. Know that the LORD, He is God; It is He who has made us, and not we ourselves; We are His people and the sheep of His pasture. Enter into His gates with thanksgiving, And into His courts with praise. Be thankful to Him, and bless His name (Psalm 100:2-4).

We call ourselves Christians and go through the motions of obedience. But when focused on self, we are in a state of always wanting more while grumbling about what we don’t have. That mindset gives God more grief than He sometimes wants to bear.

Bring no more futile sacrifices; Incense is an abomination to Me. The New Moons, the Sabbaths, and the calling of assemblies— I cannot endure iniquity and the sacred meeting. Your New Moons and your appointed feasts My soul hates; They are a trouble to Me, I am weary of bearing them. When you spread out your hands, I will hide My eyes from you; Even though you make many prayers, I will not hear. Your hands are full of blood. "Wash yourselves, make yourselves clean; Put away the evil of your doings from before My eyes. Cease to do evil, Learn to do good; Seek justice, Rebuke the oppressor; Defend the fatherless, Plead for the widow (Isaiah 1:13-17).

Close Encounters

Deep in the woods, two “young bucks” were locked in stares just five yards apart. There was irony in what was transpiring there that day. Both stood transfixed at the sight of the other’s unique species. The deer was so young that his slender horns raised above a small frame that still revealed some of the red hair he worn as a fawn. The teenage boy was so green at hunting that he didn’t recognize that the animal was legally immature. The buck, whose species is renowned for sensing danger, had apparently slept to within 5 strides of being stepped on.

We both found ourselves curiously assessing our situation and each other. After the initial shock, the rifle lowered and we just stood observing each other for a considerable period of time. His innocent curiosity was engaging. The design and structure of his limbs, marbled torso, colorful hide and “mule” tail were inspiring. His large, alert ears, twitching nostrils and “buck eyes” were captivating.

Finally, wearied from standing still for so long, I considered the options available. Scaring him off would have let me watch him run away, which could have been kind of fun. Instead, I chose to turn and let the deer watch me walk away. Why make him fear me should we meet again when we were both a little older? I thanked God for the wonderful experience and still relish that close encounter with my “first” buck.
How much more potentially wonderful are close encounters we can have with humans? The gifts of life and family interaction given by parents who have devoted a big part of their lives to us are wondrous. The gift of love and the excitement of romance with a person of a different gender can be mesmerizing. The infinite variations within God’s creation are awe-inspiring. The calling to become a firstfruit in the Family of God is a supreme blessing (Rev 20:6).

What were those things we were complaining about which we haven’t received?

Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things (Mat 6:31-32).

Whoever changes their mindset to giving and serving like the God Family does, will receive great blessings, now and forever.

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you (Mathew 6:33).

Through the years, there have been other deer, elk and a moose in our freezer. But the one I’ve been most thankful for was the one I walked away from.