Most people spend the first 18 to 20 years of their lives with their parents. What I know of my dad I learned during the time I spent with him as a young boy growing up. At age 5, I really didn't think about my relationship with him in a very serious way. As I look back, however, virtually everything I know about my father—how he walked, how he talked, how he thought, what he liked and what he excelled at—I learned by spending time doing things and talking with him as a small boy.

As a young boy

Some of my fondest memories are of the trips we took in the summer months to go fishing for brook trout in the streams of northwest Michigan. After deciding when we would go, my father would plan ahead for the food and bedding, prepare the old tent we had and gather the fishing tackle and gear we would need. We didn't have much in terms of fancy equipment, but my father used what we had. Dad taught us the basics of fishing—from baiting and setting the hook, to caring for the small trout after we caught them. While my brothers and I were always excited about the prospect of actually catching the fish, I learned many things about my dad and his personality when we spent time together on those fishing trips.

Of course, the camping and fishing trips during the summer months were not the only occasions I learned about my dad. My father was a real "Mr. Fix-it"—a household handyman who seemed to know all of the basics of carpentry, plumbing and mechanics. At the time, it seemed he could fix most anything. He taught me the value of preparation for a work project and the importance of doing a job right the first time. Of course, part of the reason I remember that "lesson" so well is that as a young boy, I occasionally didn't do things right the first time, and often paid the price!

Nonetheless, as I look back, at an early age I really didn't set out to "build a relationship" with my dad. As with most children, the relationship just happened. As a toddler and as a young boy, my dad was a part of my life in many ways. And the many hours spent with him during those formative years often made me want to be like him.

Of course, my dad was human. He wasn't perfect. He had shortcomings as all of us do. Yet, despite those, I remember some of the qualities he had that I unconsciously tried to imitate. This is true with most children as they grow up.

Another Father

While the relationship with my dad took years to build, in time I came to learn that there is another Father concerned about me and active in my life. When I was very young, I had little firsthand knowledge of this "other Dad." This other Dad was involved in my life long before I fully realized it. The other "Father" I am talking about is God—the Creator of the universe.

When young people hear about the need to have a personal relationship with God, they often ask (with good reason) how someone is supposed to have a "relationship" with a Being they have never met, cannot see and have not heard! That question has plagued mankind for centuries and continues to affect the way human beings view the entire concept of God. History has shown that despite humanity's ignorance of the true God, mankind is, nonetheless, searching for meaning to human existence and does not want to believe we are alone in the universe.

Close encounters

Over the years, there have been several movies illustrating humanity's passion for having contact with other intelligence or beings in the universe. The most famous of these movies were Steven Spielberg's Close Encounters and E.T. The intriguing thing about these movies was the fictional portrayal of people realizing that they were not alone in the universe. These motion pictures, which were immediate hits at the box office, are examples of mankind's deep curiosity and strong desire to believe that we are not alone.

More recently, the movie Contact depicted a young scientist's passion for understanding the universe and her quest to find extraterrestrial life. In the end, the main character, played by actress Jodie Foster, had "contact" with a supreme intelligence—a god-like being who informed her that mankind was not alone and that there was a greater purpose for their existence in the universe. The storyline of the movie ended with many unanswered questions. Yet, it was another example of man's longing to understand his existence and communicate with "other intelligence" in our universe. Man does not like the idea of "being alone."

Man is not alone

But can human beings really know that they are not alone in this vast universe? The apostle Paul explained that one great "proof" of God's existence was the physical creation around us. In Romans 1:19-20, he wrote, "...what may be known of God is manifest in them, for God has shown it to them. For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse."

Those of us who have an understanding of God must pursue an active relationship with Him. While God, His power and His plan are as real as the sun that rises and sets every day, without making an effort to have a real relationship with Him, we cannot hope to have a living realization of His involvement in our everyday lives.

When I was young, before I began to have knowledge of God, I was taught that any communication or relationship with God had to be through the clergy or another human being. In essence, I was taught that I could not have a "personal" relationship with my Creator—only a distant one through human mediators and a religious hierarchy. That is where my understanding of "a relationship with God" actually was formed. However, despite all of the mystery surrounding man's "contact" with his Creator—establishing "contact" and building a relationship involves little more than what we have all learned on the human level. Such a relationship demands communication and time.

Communication and time are key

Developing a relationship with God is not so different from developing a relationship with anyone else. We must spend time together. We must share our intimate thoughts, feelings and desires. We must connect. We must listen.

While these actions may seem obvious (especially as it relates to our interaction with friends), spending time talking and sharing our innermost feelings and needs is vital in establishing a relationship with God. But how and where does one start? How do we communicate with God and what do we talk about?

How the Bible explains it

The Bible provides a clear answer. A passage that is especially instructive in explaining how to have a relationship with God is found in the book of Matthew. In this passage, Jesus is teaching His disciples (followers who are learning from Him) how to pray. Prayer was not unknown at that time, but many people prayed to idols or simply recited words over and over. Unfortunately, many people still do this today.

Christ's disciples wanted to know how to communicate with the Father. Jesus gave them an outline or "model prayer" in Matthew 6:9-13: "In this manner, therefore, pray: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name. Your kingdom come. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one."

The first two words of this model prayer tell us a great deal about relationships. Notice that Jesus starts out with the word our, not the word my. The reason is that God is not only the Father of the person praying, but of many others also. In this context, the our includes the relationship with other people who look to Him. It includes those who have been called by Him to be part of His Church. In that sense, Christ's model prayer assumes our relationship with other brethren as our spiritual family in His Church.

In addition, the word Father implies a unique relationship with God. Note that the relationship is not that of a wife to a husband, two people dating one another or a neighbor to another neighbor. It is a child to a father relationship.

Establishing the relationship

There are some religions that teach that your "contact" with God must go through another person. The Bible tells us that is simply not true. You can talk to God directly through prayer. Praying is a way of talking to God. The Bible tells us that God listens to our prayers and we can use the model prayer above to get us started. You will notice it basically contains four parts:

• Recognition of God as Creator—realizing to whom we are speaking.
• Requests made of God—expressing our needs.
• Asking for forgiveness—acknowledging our mistakes and need to change.
• Requests to keep us from temptation—asking for God's protection and guidance in life.

In recognizing God as our Creator and Provider, it is also vitally important to be reminded of the many blessings that really do come from Him. Thankfulness and appreciation are important elements in our communication with God, as well. We should be "giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ" (Ephesians 5:20, emphasis added).

Many people have been brought up believing that God wants or even requires words in prayer to be eloquently composed, with an adequate number of "thees" and "thous"! But this is not the case. God looks upon the heart (1 Samuel 16:7). Our sincerity when talking to God is the most important element of our communication. While the Bible does talk about the advantage of praying in a more private and secluded area, God wants to hear from us whenever we have the need to talk with Him.

The Bible is God's communication

You may say to yourself that you have talked to God but wonder why He has never talked to you. That's a good question and it does have an answer. God speaks to us through the Bible. The Bible was provided by God so we can know who He is, what He is like, how He thinks and how He feels. The Bible is God's instruction book and His "Word." It is one of God's main ways of "speaking" to those who seek Him, those who desire to communicate with Him and have a relationship with Him.

We all have a spiritual Father. As with our physical dads, getting to know the Creator of the Universe and building a relationship with Him takes time. It takes time talking to Him and knowing that He cares. But that relationship will be incomplete unless we begin to listen to Him by reading His Word—the Bible. God's Word provides answers to many of the tough questions of life, in addition to giving us advice on how to live. To learn more about the Bible, request your free copies of the booklets, Is the Bible True? and How to Understand the Bible.

Take time with Him

All of you reading this article have or had a dad. We came to know our dads through the time we spent together. Similarly, all of us can have a growing relationship with our spiritual Father. The more time we spend with God, the more we get to know Him, the more we will want to model our lives after Him. Whether we have realized it or not, God is already involved in our lives. As His children, we need to take the time to begin talking with Him to build a meaningful relationship—one that will last for eternity. YU