Often we guys encounter what feels like a gaping hole: the craving to have companionship that goes beyond calling someone a friend. We know God created this desire in us because He said, "It is not good that man should be alone" (Genesis 2:18).

But we also have to recognize that timing is important. If we try to force a relationship with a girl before getting to know her well, we are asking for unnecessary pain and difficulties. In contrast, waiting for God's timing and putting friendship first allows us to enjoy His blessings to the utmost.

So we need to know how to get to know girls without aiming for a full-blown romantic relationship.

Think about it this way. When all is said and done, you are going to be married to only one person. That means you will ultimately be maintaining one romantic relationship: the one you'll share with your wife. Regardless of how many friendships you develop before that time, you can only carry one through into marriage.

Knowing this, is it logical to put a great deal of time and effort into building romantic relationships that you will have to discard entirely at some point in the future? Instead, first establish strong friendships that can remain constant.

Friendship is wonderful because it allows two people to get to know each other without any exclusive or unreasonable expectations of one another. Here is the opportunity to get to know a girl for who she is.

A healthy, romantic relationship must be built on friendship. It is impossible to have a meaningful relationship with someone you don't know. It is, of course, possible to feel strong physical attraction without deeper understanding, but this feeling will not last.

If you jump into a serious, romantic relationship, it is more likely to fall apart. When it does, there's no friendship to fall back on. Nothing will be left because the entire relationship was built on only superficial feelings.

When we're infatuated, we don't want to hear that our feelings are superficial. We want to believe that what we feel is different and special. But if we're honest with ourselves, we'll see that our excitement is based on something not much different than the countless other passionate but ultimately shallow relationships all around us. Without friendship as a foundation, relationships are doomed from the start.

So guys, when you find yourself interested in a girl, don't dive headfirst into a romance. Be patient, trust God and get to know her as a friend. Guard her heart as well as your own, staying mindful of the ultimate relationship to come. With this focus, the blessing of a deep relationship will be yours when the time is right.